Our Smart Baby

Parenting With Natural Consequences

Remember the other day when I mentioned that we use
natural consequences in our parenting? Well, here are
the details:

Rewards and punishments just do not work for us. I
will never tell my son that I am going to take away a
toy or book if he doesn’t do “fill in the blank”. I
find that totally disrespectful of him and it doesn’t
teach him anything but resentment and anger. No thank
you! Using natural consequences teaches him what will
happen naturally… in the real world. An example would
be that if it’s cold outside but he doesn’t want to
wear his coat I’ll let him. He will get cold and
realize that he needs to put his coat on! I feel that
I need to say that you only use the natural
consequence if it will not cause your child any harm.
That’s where logical consequences come into play.

Logical consequences are those that you put into play
because of what your child did. Example: my son lets
go of my hand and is getting ready to run into the
parking lot. Logical consequence I impose on him is
that he now has to ride in the buggy to the car.
Another example would be that we’re at home playing in
the front yard. My son’s ball goes out into the road
and he goes to follow it. He’s not paying any
attention to the fact that there is a car coming. I
call to him to stop him as I am running in his
direction just in case. He now has to stay inside for
the rest of the afternoon. Logical consequence. Makes
sense, right?

This isn’t the easiest parenting style by far. It
takes a lot of planning and thinking about what the
natural consequence would be and what a fair logical
consequence would be. But it is truly a learning
experience for your kids, not just a punishment that
makes them feel belittled and resentful.

By: Danica Bailey